Hey...

Hey
Im just sitting here waiting to be tired,seeing as how I had another 4 hour nap today. Yes.four!!
I have been sick today which has made me one mean mama and girlfriend. I just didnt understand why today of all day when the house needed to be cleaned and the girls were both home,I couldnt do anything.I barely left the couch today,other then to run to the  bathroom.
Now Im sitting here just thinking about ,a little bit of everything. We just got a cheque and it pretty much just covered the rent,now I need diapers and milk,groceries among other things,and we really do not have it. We have to now wait again for another week before another cheque comes in the mail..I know I know,at least money is coming but the thing is,we could use it now,not a wk from now. I hate having to borrow money through winter months and be getting a job right now just isnt worth it. the money I would be making would be going right to the babysitter to watch Jaylah while Im gone. Its tough but Im thankful that spring is coming and this winter is over. Its been one hell of a year. Between moving,court,calling off the engagement and everything in between its been so stressful and LONG. I can begin to imagine what 2011 is going to be like. I have big plans this year to start saving for a surgery I want,and to travel with our kids. Id love to take them to Jamaica and or Florida. I love seeing them happy,and want to share my love of travelling with them as much as I possibly can. I am so worried that this year might just break J and I, its been 3 years (5 on and off) and we are still fighting to be together,even though sometimes it just seems like we are fighting. I love him more then most ppl know,even more then what I know at times but things are a lot more complicated now then they have ever been. I want to keep working at it,and so does he. So Im thinking that this will be hard but we are lucky to have each other and as long as I stay focused on that,maybe another year will have come and gone before I know it.
Have to say that Im watching the new Teen Mom and Im in LOVE with it. Jenelle is my fave. yeah yeah yeah say what u will think what you will but this is my blog,my life..I am my own person. LOL. They are all special and great in their own ways. I know this has nothing to do with what I have been talking about but its a pretty big thing in my life.Tuesday nights with the girls from Teen Mom make me feel ,well not so alone.
love me